God, Part One

What if God isn’t all He’s cracked up to be?

I mean, let’s face it, there is greatness there. He created the heavens and the earth, and He created everything else in the known universe and all the unknown things in all the universes unknown to us. But omnipotent? I’m not always so sure.

Omniscient? Yeah, probably. All knowing, but not saying a word. “Only God knows, and He’s not talking,” my mother used to respond to some of my questions on various subjects.

Omnipresent? I believe God is everywhere, or at least evidence of His handiwork is everywhere. No God, no sky, no God, no sun, etc. He created everything, so He is, in a sense, everywhere. But is He EVERYWHERE? Is He everywhere at every moment, looking down on each one of the billions of us at every moment? That’s a tall task, even for the omnipotent.

That’s my fear, that when I get to meet Him, as I think everyone does when they die, that God is going to confess His lack of omnipotence. He will be as I imagine others imagine Him, long flowing white beard, long flowing white robes. He will be as Homer Simpson described Him: “Perfect teeth, nice smell. Class act all the way.” But he will be despondent when we meet. He will sit upon a throne, an elbow to one knee as He puts a hand up to his forehead, when He tells me guiltily, “I’m not what everyone thinks I am. I’m not quite perfect. I’ve made mistakes.”

This isn’t really what you want to hear from God.

I don’t get beyond that brief snippet of conversation that I have run like a film in my mind. I’m not sure I want to. What would He tell me? That the Devil wins more than a few battles? That “free will” is a concept conceived to cover up His inadequacies? Why would you give free will to a human race that can’t resist chocolate, much less all the really seriously sinful worldly temptations?

There’s a lot of unexplained horror in the world. Always has been. There’s unexplained sorrow. Always has been. Just saying it’s all part of God’s plan doesn’t really offer up much of an explanation, and, if you think about it, it’s not much comfort to those in times of need.

So perhaps that’s the one thing to look forward to when we die. Explanations. At least I hope we get explanations when we die, the mysteries will be solved, the ignorant dark made into the light of knowing. Because if I there’s no explanations waiting for me, I’m not so sure I want to go.